Monday, March 16th, 2015
He's there again. I can see him out of the corner of my eye, a bit blurry and out of focus, but there. If I turn my head to get a better look he disappears. Sometimes he'll just reappear to the other side of me a few seconds later, other times he won't show himself for a few hours, or a few days. He's not always there either, but I can say for sure whenever he shows up, everything just seems worse. There's a feeling of dread that just hangs over me and colors my whole day.
One time he wasn't there for a week, and I can say with all confidence it was the best week of my life. No feeling like I was being watched. No strange, blurry people lurking at the corners of my vision. No creeping sense of unease haunting me all day long. Everyone I saw was real, and it was fantastic.
Sadly, like most good things it wasn't meant to last. I was just starting to fall asleep when I heard a low hum. If it wasn't dead silent, I probably wouldn't have ever noticed it. Figured that it was just something outside, and if I just lay there long enough with my eyes closed I'd eventually get to sleep.
I was wrong.
The hum slowly built in volume into this this godawful ringing. Like the ringing you get after a concert, but easily ten times louder. I sat bolt upright, hands clamped over my ears and screaming. The only reason I knew I was screaming is because I felt myself doing it. Couldn't hear it, not over that godawful noise. I didn't know what the hell was happening to me, and a dozen different fears raced through my mind, most of them having to do with aneurysms, brain tumors, and the like. I'm not kidding when I say I was afraid I was going to die.
The noise reached a crescendo, and I was sure something was going to burst, whether it be my eardrums or a blood vessel in my brain. Then, just like that, it stopped. No more noise, just a completely silent room. My face was wet with tears and snot, so clearly I'd been crying, and I could have started up again from the sheer joy of being free of that godawful noise. Didn't want to go back to sleep like that, so I fumbled for the light, wanting to go clean myself up. That, and go get a couple of Advil since my head hurt.
While I was doing that, I felt a prickling on the back of my neck, like someone was staring at me. It didn't take me all that long to realize that he'd returned, and sure enough, a sideward glance revealed that there he was, sitting on the end of my bed. Even though his expressions are never really clear, I got the distinct impression that he was annoyed. Seems the asshole doesn't like being ignored, even for things like sleep. This was the first time he'd actually hurt me though. What changed, I don't know, but right then I didn't care if His Highness was displeased. He was angry? Good for him. So was I.
It's weird to yell at someone without actually looking at them, but I did. I didn't want him to just disappear on me.
"The hell is wrong with you?"
I didn't really expect an answer. He never speaks. Instead, he smiled.